So once upon a time I thought I would be less busy when soccer season was over. WRONG! I transitioned right into Northwestern football. I've learned so much about myself over the last couple of weeks. One thing is that I love to feel needed I hate being in a situation where I feel like I'm just taking up space. I've felt needed both at Humboldt where I've been tutoring and at Northwestern (although not all the time...) both experiences have been so good but as I get to the point were I no longer am required to be at these things I struggle because part of me wants to keep going to them but the other part says I really, really need a break if I'm not going to burn out before the end of the semester. I think the hardest part is because I feel like I'm abandoning people, I know they will get along just fine without me but part of me wants to say yes to everything even though it would make me insanely busy... I can't wait until I have a job where it's my job to follow up and I don't have to switch sports or go to a completely different school (as has been the case recently). I think that the root of this has something to do with the rejection and sense of abandonment I have felt over the years or simply the fact that when I move onto a new stage in life the people I was close to previously tend fall off the face of the earth... (no offense to any of you if you ever read this, but that is life to some extent...) So as I move on from Northwestern to a week off (plus Thanksgiving Break!) and then to Concordia University I'm not sure what I feel, a sense of sadness coupled with excitement about the new things that I will be experiencing.

Today was such a strange day! Got up this morning prepared to go to Northwestern's last football game (had the layers of clothes set out and everything!) and I peak out my window and there is SNOW EVERYWHERE! At this point I'm super excited cause it's gorgeous and just plain exciting (Basically I know I'm not going to fall back asleep anytime soon!) Well this is great and all except for the fact that it meant that Martin Luther College wasn't going to travel to the cities for the game I was supposed to help cover (which is now moved to tomorrow--Sunday...) Which pretty much messed up my carefully laid Sunday plans (which included church, 2 group project meetings and the soccer banquet!)

I ended up taking a walk around Bethel on the "Nature path" and took a bunch of pictures with my camera which was super fun cause I didn't have to worry about it getting wet cause it's waterproof!!! Oh and I even went to some of Bethel's football game.